Hot Mommas

Mother and Daughter

My kids all thought I was cool until they were about 12 years old. After that age I suddenly became weird, stupid or even worse in their eyes. It got especially bad when they were about 13-16, most of the time I was just a huge source of embarrassment during these tumultuous years. I got it; I remember that strange feeling of being proud of my parents and yet utterly embarrassed by them at the same time. Thankfully, I out grew that stage and came to realize how cool my parents really were. It was amazing when my oldest daughter came to think of me as cool again, strange and yet wonderful.

I was not really even aware that it had happened with her except that I could tell she had started to appreciate things that before she had never even noticed. It started when she went off to college as a freshman a few years ago. Up until that date my husband and I had tried for most of her high school years to get her to sit down with us as a family and eat the evening meal. Most of the time she refused, one excuse after another, things like “I have a game to go to, I am meeting my study group, I am singing at the basketball game or I have to study and I already ate” were what we usually heard. Trying not to feel rejected we’d sit down to eat with our two younger children, feeling like something was missing.

This was the routine most nights so imagine our surprise when she came home for her first Thanksgiving and announced enthusiastically to the family “I can’t wait to have a nice family meal together like we used to!”

“When was that?” my never subtle husband asked.

“Are you kidding?” I asked, staring at her like I was the butt of a bad joke.

“Oh ya, and can you make green beans and mashed potatoes too mom? She begged of me.

“Ummm, I guess I could make green beans and mashed potatoes if that is what you really want.” I answered still very confused. She really wanted me to open a can of Green Giant Green Beans and make instant mashed potatoes? I wondered to myself.

That was how it started and it left me speechless in many ways. Suddenly my kid, the one I could barely make sit still for a family moment for most of her high school and junior high years, wanted nothing more than to hang out at home and soak up the experience of being with us. Wow!

My husband  and I laughed about it and thought we should have sent her off to college years ago!

It came up again a few weeks ago and I am still a bit speechless about it. Liz and her roommate were talking to me about my bucket list one day and I mentioned I had never been to the Rose, a country western bar here in town, and that it was on my list. Christina jumped on board immediately and said “Miss Jackie, you have to go out with us to the Rose! We will take you out drinking with us! Oh, it will be so fun!” She gushed.

“Oh dear,” I thought, terrified of the idea of going out with the girls drinking and acting all crazy like a kid.

“Oh I don’t think that is a good idea.” I fearfully hedged.

“Will you come if we can get another mom?” she challenged.

I don’t know what came over me but I said, “yes, if you can get another mom I will go.”

I was pretty sure this would go nowhere but no, within three weeks the girls called to say they had it all set up. The  Rose, Friday evening, Josh Abbott concert.

I found out later they had convinced my friend Laura to go too, Mykala’s mom.

Young and Fun

When Laura and I walked into the bar we were met by four adorable college girls all dressed to the hilt in short denim mini skirts and white shirts and cowboy boots. They looked so fresh and young, so very pretty.

“The mommas are here!” they yelled in unison at the top of their lungs as Laura and I paid the cover charge. “The hot mommas are here!” They squealed.

“Oh Lord, do they have to announce to the world we are the moms?” We looked awkwardly at each other as we headed toward the kids. This was weird.

Think about it. I have spent the past 21 years trying to be a good mom. Trying to keep my underage daughter from drinking and doing other such dangerous and illegal things. Suddenly, just because she turned 21 and decided I was kind of cool now I was supposed to be ok going to the bar and partying with her? I just don’t know…. This was just not right.

I had a beer and tried to join in the silliness. Laura had shots with the girls, which I thought was very brave. Soon the boys arrived. Yes, boys to me, but they were really not boys. Five twenty-something college graduates arrived and the girls went crazy. The “boys” did not quite now what to do with us moms either. Levi ordered us a round and did a shot with Laura. My excuse was I was the driver. Lame, I know.

Next we were on the dance floor getting lost in the music and atmosphere. The “boys” took us out for a spin, the girls laughed and tried their hand at the two-step. Laura proved the best dancer of the group. Who knew?


In the end the evening was really a lot of fun, very different, but fun. It was interesting to see the girls as young women, the boys as young men, the moms as something other than moms. It felt strange and uncomfortable, kind of like new shoes that you really like but just aren’t used to yet. I tried to act like a kid again and I tried to see my daughter not as a kid but as a grown woman. The roles were different but not bad, just new and kind of foreign feeling.

It felt strange to see how excited the girls were that we were at the bar with them. They were genuinely excited and you could see it in their faces. They were proud of us. We were proud of them. I held back but I think I can get used to this in time. I would like to do that again. Who knows maybe next time I’ll call a cab and do shots with them too!

So my friend I ask you, “what’s next on your list?”

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