Just Keep Swimming

I believe in writing your own script in life. From my point of view, which you may agree with or not, that’s ok either way, why would I want to follow someone else’s definition of what my life should be. I do think a lot of people do this and I believe this is why there are so many unhappy people in this world. Happiness should be something we choose. To choose otherwise, means you are living according to someone else’s idea of what you should and should not do.

I think many people do this because it is easier than writing their own script. Think about it, no big decisions to be made, no unchartered waters to navigate, no skinned up knees or broken hearts and when it doesn’t work out then you can always blame someone else for your unhappiness!

It may be the road less traveled, it may or may not work out, but I have to do it my way. I have to live life on my own terms, but in the spirit of full disclosure, I do have to note that sometimes when you are writing your own script in life it all doesn’t go according to plan. “Character is what you do when no one is looking” What do you do when life throws you a curve ball and it doesn’t go according to plan? Well, I think you take care of yourself, and you keep working your plan. But first you have to have a plan. What I don’t think you can do is panic and switch directions. Like Dory says on Finding Nemo, “just keep swimming” sometimes the best thing you can do is just keep moving.

My life the past couple of weeks as been less than stellar. Less than fun, less than easy. I have had my moments, in fact, this morning I was curled up in the fetal position on the couch but in the end I have tried to suck it up and keep going in the direction I chose.

What’s is the problem? What’s gone wrong, what am I stressed out about?

Here is a sampling of my fears:

-business is open, we’ve been working toward this goal for months, we love it, it is fun and …. We don’t have enough traffic through the doors yet. What do we do? It’s easy to panic, look back at our choices and say to your self, “OMG what were we thinking, this was the worst decision ever, now we are doomed, what are we going to do, this is going to be a disaster…… The reality is that this was a good idea, we have made huge progress, we are passionate about what we are doing, we are working 14 hour days, we are establishing a presence in a new community, we are planting seeds and it takes time for seeds to grow. Now it the time to cheer each other on and keep planning seeds. Don’t look back. Don’t panic.

-house is back on the market….we’ve done this before, in fact we moved 7 times in the first 14 years of our marriage, we had the house on the market last summer but our timing was off. In fact, we put the house on the market right when everyone else did and right when the news from Euorpean markets sounded dismal. We listed it for 4 months, had excellent feedback, showed it 25 times and then finally said enough was enough. We are hearing now that the market is different, that inventory is down 40 percent and showings are up 30%. We need to relocate so we can minimize our commute and simplify our life. This week we cleaned it back up and put it back on the market. I am trying to motivate to o this again. I need it to sell.

Motherhood-I try to do it all. I try to be all the things a great mom should be, supportive, encouraging, loving, strict, forgiving, understanding, sympathetic, organized, lovable, encouraging, etc. etc. etc. I, like most mom’s I know, try to do this while also managing the rest of the family, the house, the schedules, the pets, the bills and work. Apparently, lately I have been fooling myself that I have got it all under control.

The other night my 11 year old brought me in this little note. Let me just say “From the Mouths of Babe’s” check it out yourself and tell me what you think she is trying to tell me? Funny but not funny. I tried to take notice, but how bad is it when your child puts it to you as directly as mine just did. Priorities! Too much on mom’s plate, child feeling left out, get your act together mom!

Job-too much to do and not enough time or staff to get it all done about sums it up. I feel like a typical day is one step forward and three steps backward. As soon as I get one crisis averted another one pops up on the radar. It is rewarding, I feel like I am where I am supposed to be but ………

Finances-there is always more month than paycheck. Need I say more….

Fitness-I am 8 weeks into my first 10 week challenge and starting to feel much stronger and I am steadily getting leaner which is really exciting. Unfortunately, the past two days I have been nursing an achy shoulder, the one I had surgery on 5 years ago. I am trying to step back and give it time to heal, I am trying not to “disasterize” which is my own word for my favorite hobby, jumping from one conclusion to another until the worst possible scenario has happened. In this case, I not dealing with a tweaked shoulder that is tired and sore from 8 weeks of 6 day a week kickboxing training, no I am dealing with Rotary Cuff surgery again, months of rehab, limited mobility, cronic pain…….. see what I mean.

Life isn’t always a bowl of cherry’s and just because I like to tell funny stories about my adventures doesn’t mean I too don’t face the same challenges as the rest of the world, it just means it is time for me to “just keep swimming”

So my friend, I ask you “what’s next on your list?”

The list goes on and on of what feel’s more out of control in my life right now rather than in control.

All I can do is just keep swimming, try to simplify where I can, keep my priorities straight and say a lot of prayers in the meantime.

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